Expectations on the “day of love”

Happy Valentine’s Day everyone!

This day means a lot of different things to a lot of different people. To some it is an extra special day for celebrating the love that is shared with a special someone, for others it is a day to celebrate all the love that exists in their lives, and for others still it is a sad day that’s only purpose seems to be reminding them of their single status.

The existence of the holiday can be attributed to St. Valentine of Rome whose feast day is the 14th of February. He is typically associated with “courtly love,” but in reality he was a faithful man who was ultimately killed for his beliefs and mission. A beautiful sentiment that a man who loved the Lord so much, ultimately became the namesake for a holiday associated with love even if most people don’t really think of it as his feast day.

So what is my expectation on this feast day turned commercial love holiday? I would love to say it makes no difference to me and it’s just another day, but unfortunately that is not fully true. I would also really like to blame social media, but ultimately the blame falls nowhere in particular.

It is worth saying that I am still very single. I am not upset about it; I don’t have the time necessary to pour into a relationship that involves pursuing a man’s love, affection, and respect. Plus, there is a lot to be said about self love prior to romantic entanglement. While I am not upset by the fact that I’m not currently in a relationship, it is tough to see many happy couples celebrating the affection they have for each other all at once. Seeing happy couples on a day to day basis is typically very encouraging to me; it is beautiful to see reflections of Christ’s love in their relationships. However, it can be discouraging when you feel like the only single in a room filled with couples. I fully understand that I am far from being the only single person my age, but few people blow up facebook/twitter/instagram/ snapchat with their single-hood on Valentine’s day. The love I receive from God, my family, and my friends is so sweet and I cherish it very much, but for me at this point in life my expectation of Valentine’s Day is tinged with a little nostalgia and longing.

I have spoken about this previously, but due to the way I’m feeling today, and surely some others out there as well, it is relevant again. Missing being spoken for is not unheard of when you see picture after picture of happy people out on Valentine’s dates whether or not you are missing the person who held your heart in the past. It can be hard to be single on a day when so many are celebrating finding their “perfect match,” but it is important to keep some things in mind. If you have been in a relationship before and are not anymore, there is a reason for it; learn from the relationship you had with that person and allow it to help you to be a better significant other in the future. If you have never been in a relationship before, you are not alone in your wait; when you decide to put your heart out there for someone it will be so so special. Lastly, it is of limitless importance that you remember that there are oceans of love all around us (I know that is hard to believe sometimes when you watch the news, but I promise it’s out there!) that comes to us in so many forms: a friend, a minister, a customer service rep. who made your experience pleasant, that guy who let you into traffic, and the list goes on and on. Look for the love that is in this world and the wait for the one who will walk beside you in life and love you in a way you have only dreamed will seem to get here much faster.

I hope you are all having the loveliest February!

M

PS I’m less than month away from finishing my final classes for nursing school and entering into my preceptorship during which I will shadow the same nurse for a month and basically work beside her as a regular nurse. Please pray for me during this exciting and terrifying time!

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